In the words of the always wise Eric Matthews, “life’s tough, get a helmet.” I always took this to mean that life basically sucks and there’s essentially nothing you can do about it so toughen up.
Well, if you read my blog about becoming your own Prince Charming, you’ll know that I’ve had a rough start to this year. It started with an overall unhappiness in myself, followed by a severe lack of motivation, continued with my ongoing hatred of my job, and wrapped up with the ending of a long-term relationship. These days I sometimes find myself struggling with my new reality and dwelling on all the things that have gone so wrong in such a short amount of time.
Upon some introspection and a lesson in Cognitive Reappraisal from my good friend Vanessa, who writes an incredible mental health blog called Happiness Sold Separately, I realized that I’ve been wasting my time blaming circumstance for my unhappiness and neglecting all the accomplishments I’ve already achieved and the numerous opportunities that still lie ahead.
Allow me to demonstrate for all you beautiful people…
I’m So Fat
Let me begin by saying that I’m not here to shame you for any choices you make in life; actually quite the opposite. I truly believe that you, yes you, have a PERFECT body and the beach and its goers alike should be so lucky to get a mere glance at whatever you decide to wear when you grace them with your presence. You only get one body in this life and it does a lot for you so show that gorgeous babe some respect.
As for me, I started this year just one pound away from being considered obese for my height because I LOVE food. Like a lot. You know what I don’t love? Running.
Now, I’m not saying that being in this weight class is inherently a bad thing, a lot of people in similar situations live perfectly happy lives and at the end of the day, that’s all that matters. But diabetes runs rampant in my family and losing my health because of my poor life choices is simply not in my life plan.
So there I was, “new year new me” and all that nonsense, when I realized 2019 Angelica was just as unhappy with herself as 2018 Angelica. That’s when I decided enough is enough and I made a change; my lazy, pasta/candy/pizza/burger/brownie loving self decided to hop on Whole30 and what a wild ride it’s been. Now, when I’m feeling bad about myself, instead of dwelling on the pounds I still have to lose, I try to focus on the progress I’ve already made in just a few short months and it gives me the motivation to carry on.
I’m Doing Nothing With My Life
Recently, I’ve felt little reason to wake up every morning besides than the need to go to work. I didn’t feel like I had a lot going on so what’s the point? I won’t get into it too much, I think we’ve all been there.
Anyway, when I find myself feeling defeated, I try to think of the things I do have going for me instead of all the things I feel are “missing.” Like I mentioned above, getting my body back to looking and feeling great has been an every day goal for me. I’ve also thrown myself into this awesome blog that I love so much. It’s been an outlet for me and has provided stability when everything else feels like it’s falling apart.
The point is, there will always be things you don’t have and goals you haven’t yet achieved. And that’s okay; YOU ARE OKAY regardless of the point in your journey that you’re in today. It’s so important to have goals in your life, but it can be a mighty fine line between having a long list of ambitions and a long list of things you aren’t good enough for yet. Be sure to keep fighting for the things you want.
Pro Tip: Being an overly ambitious person like myself can be stressful to say the least. It’s easy to become overwhelmed and want to just give up. My secret is to constantly remind myself that the days go by whether you put the work in or not. If you have a goal, even a far-fetched goal, put in a little work every day so that each day counts towards your progress.
I Hate My Job
Does anyone actually enjoy working? I know there’s that saying “do something you love and you’ll never work a day in your life” and I LOVE marketing, but man oh man I have never felt like I’d just stick around if they stopped paying me to be there.
It’s so easy to be negative at work every day. It’s almost second nature to hate the hours between seven and three, but think about it: that’s 2,080 hours or 87 full days of every year that you’re unhappy. That is a huge chunk of your life.
I’ve decided that instead wasting all this time and energy, I’m going to open myself up to the opportunity of a new position with a new company. See what I did there? Attitude adjustment.
I Got Dumped
There you have it folks, plain and simple. This one was definitely the hardest to wrap my head around. You spend so much of your life planning a future with someone and when they decide to walk away, it can be challenging to practice self-love every day.
I’m not going to tell you that this one flipped like a switch the way the others did. It took time, self-care, and a lot of tears to get to where I am today, but hey, here we are! I’ve consciously changed the way I look at the ending of my relationship. Instead of crying over what I thought we had, I spend my time looking forward to meeting someone new and the adventures that we’ll embark upon together in the future.
The point of this tangent is to tell you that although I’ve been away for a bit, this blog is so important to me and I’m happy to finally be back to regularly scheduled programming.
In a final effort to make this blog as cliche as possible, I’ll mention that you truly do reap what you sow. If you sit with your negativity, you’ll only breed more negativity in your life. Yes, sometimes life gets tough, it’s inevitable; but if you take a minute to stop and smell the flowers and give yourself a good old fashioned attitude adjustment, you really will be okay. You believed in Santa Clause for a good eight years, you can believe in yourself for five minutes. Just give it a shot.